Who am I?
I am a physician with a special interest in parenthood and breastfeeding.
One of my goals is to make mothers' lives easier by helping them navigate the multitude of information we are constantly inundated with.
If you want to know more about my journey, read on...
My name is Alice, I'm 31 years old, I'm a mother of two and a Family Doctor in training.
How did I get interested in the area of motherhood and breastfeeding? This wonderful chapter of my life began in 2022 while I was training to become a Neurologist.
The training was intense, to say the least. Demanding hours, competition among colleagues, sexism and constant pressure. The reality I encountered was very far from what I had imagined. It contrasted with many of my ideals, and it definitely wasn’t what I wanted for my day-to-day life. I felt constrained. Like I was using all my energy and time doing something that didn’t even suit me after all. Most of the people at work seemed disconnected from what they were doing. They all looked so angry and frustrated all the time. It really made me wonder: what drives them to keep doing this? Is it just about the prestige and power? And what about me? Why am I doing this?
For some time I suppressed everything, I thought I was just being childish. That I just needed to toughen up and endure it all.
I gradually started to lose my appetite. I couldn't sleep. I began to feel that I had no energy or desire to spend time with my 3-year-old daughter, whom I hardly even knew anymore.
I started feeling like the only thing I could actually do was work. When I wasn't working I had a hard time enjoying myself or the time with my family because the thought of work was always there.
Finally, I realized that no one was forcing me to stay there. And so, despite the tremendous effort I had made to enter into the Neurology training and to endure the time there, and despite not knowing what to do with my life, I found the courage to quit.
I started working part-time in an Emergency Department and, after recovering from my burnout, I got pregnant for the second time.
...
A little side note about Sofia, my first daughter: she was born in 2018 during my final year of medical school in Milan. I call that chapter of my life “spontaneity”. Sofia’s father and I were very in love and without giving it many thoughts we figured having a baby was the right thing to do. I was 24 and starting my last year of uni, Filippo was opening his own activity. We were young and naive. Ah ah ah. To add fuel to the fire we then decided to move to Portugal when she was 4 months old.
Well to cut it short Sofia's arrival was a hurricane. I always thought that I could improvise and get away with things in life, but Sofia proved me wrong. I was deeply unprepared for it all. Everything, from childbirth to breastfeeding, was a struggle. I enjoyed very little of my first moments as a mother, and I can honestly say I just wanted time to go by.
To my horror everyone kept telling us things would even get harder as time passed, “Oh wait till she is teething…till she’s walking”... thankfully for us it was the opposite. Things just got easier and easier as she grew up. Soon those tough times became just a memory and the fun part began and still goes on. Sofia is almost 6 and is one of the most curious and caring people I know. She's awesome.
But as we say in italian "Every cockroach is beautiful to its mother" ahah.
…
Back to my second pregnancy… This time I wanted things to go differently.
I don't remember how but i stumbled upon the positive birth movement.
I discovered about all these women actually enjoying themselves throughout pregnancy, breastfeeding, and even birthing (!!!).
Birthing was my sore spot as with Sofia it was probably the most traumatic part of it all. So when I heard that there was a method called “Hypnobirthing” that was helping out many women, I decided it to give it a try too. I’ll certainly talk about it more in future entries, but essentially Hypnobirthing is a combination of relaxation and deep breathing techniques that you practice throughout pregnancy to get ready for birth (and not only). With my partner Filippo, we spent many months practicing it under the guidance of our dear Hypnobirthing trainer, Charlotte. We enjoyed it quite a lot!
In the meantime I took up meditation and journaling. I kept active and tried to eat healthy. I stuck to my routines and I can honestly say that the 9 months of my second pregnancy were probably the most serene months of my adult life.
Towards the end of the pregnancy, I read “Breastfeeding Made Simple: Seven Natural Laws for Nursing Mothers” by K. Kendall-Tackett and N. Mohrbacher. I even took little notes and drew sketches from it, what a nerd...
But this time I was determined to make things work!
How did it turn out?
Revolutionary.
Who would have thought?
I did indeed enjoy my labor and birthing experience, it was fast and peaceful to the point that I didn’t even need an epidural. Everything was just smooth. Better than I could have ever imagined. The breastfeeding came easily and painlessly. The nights weren't even a problem anymore. To my surprise this time around I actually feel like time is passing by too fast.
The point is this whole process changed me.
It's not just a matter of: good experience VS bad one. I had a bad experience with my first child, it's in the past. It's over. But the feeling of empowerment I got out of this second journey I know it's something that will never go away. This is why I talk of revolution.
And in my case a big role in all of this was: information.
I think you really just can’t wing it when it comes to motherhood.
So after having processed all of this, I started feeling an urge to share this with the world.
This is the reason why i got into Family Medicine so that I'd get to deal with mothers and their kids everyday. Also I wanted a better quality of life.
I’m currently in my first year of training (out of four).
I'm also halfway through a post-graduate course on Breastfeeding that will end in April 2024.
The intention of the blog, for the moment, is to accompany this new journey.
\>> aliceavanzo1992@gmail.com